There’s only one person worse than the success driven, self exalting fool . It is the fool with just as much pride- only for his failures- the self-pitying fool.
Both have unique character traits, although with much in common. The first person tends to think more highly of himself than actually matches up with reality, although often it works in his favor. He is able to achieve a lot via confidence and hard work. However, at work, he is overbearing and impatient. Highly successful or disciplined, he recognizes that time is money, and people are either an asset or an impediment to acquiring mass quantities of both. He certainly does love his wife and children, at least to an extent. The problems arise only when they interfere with a game watching, hobby practicing, health maintaining, comfort-pursuing lifestyle. He tends to be more pleased with his successful kids. Dropped fly balls and bad report cards do not help the family legacy. He has subtle ways, and not so subtle ways to communicate these concerns. His wife and kids are similar to his co-workers/employees- on a certain level he cares about them all, devoting more effort to the ones who have more potential. Keep in mind...he’s not an all bad guy, he is extremely productive and passionate about his profession and sports team. He knows when to say the right things in social settings- and that overall acheivement is not as important as being a good person. In his mind, he is a good person. It’s really impossible to understand his wife’s discontentment, particularly because he is an excellent provider.
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| Selfishness Lurking |
Unlike self-exalting fool, self pitying fool has a couple extremely useful weapons: false humility and cynicism. Frankly, they make him even more sinister than self-exalting fool. At least with self-exalting fool you know what you’re getting into. By all accounts, self pitying fool is modest, nice, and a non -confrontational sort of person. Yet self pitying fool does not take much of a leadership role at home. He believes his wife is better with that sort of thing. He is emotionally disconnected most of the time, and is constantly capitulating in order to avoid conflict, which frustrates his wife even further. He says things like, “Well it’s just who I am” and “you knew that when you married me.” Dealing with depression from his lack of achievement and other qualities, he attributes much of who he is today to his self exalting fool of a father and never measuring up to Dad. The trouble is, ‘Dad’ is not nearly as bad as this dud of a son makes him out to be. Occasionally self pitying fool is able to view himself as something other than his father’s ‘other son,’ only to fail to measure up to his own standards. You really never know when self pitying fool is going to give up, quit, or not show up. That’s what makes him worse, if only slightly, from self exalting fool. Not only does he have the same discontentment, he doesn’t even get the benefit of all the disciplined, hard work.
A Great Redemption
So let’s be straight. It’s hard to label people either as one fool or the other. Particularly if you see traits from both fools in your own life. Ultimately, all that’s left is a gnawing sense that neither one is really worth the air they breathe. They would be better off dead. So what option we are left with?
They can die
In Paul’s letter to the Galatians, chapter 2:20, he says,
“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”
The gospel is really the answer to so many problems. Through faith in the One who paid the penalty, Jesus, these fools can also be put to death. This is really important. So often we are told, or live under the impression that Jesus died so that we can live- that we can have eternal life. This is partially true. But it is a danger if we forget something vital – he died, suffered a brutal death, so we also might die- all the fleshly passions, seflish desires, and sin.
Paul further explains, in 2 Corinthians 5:17-21:
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”
So anyway, this is great news.
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